“Why are kids skipping through life? - Deseret News” plus 1 more |
| Why are kids skipping through life? - Deseret News Posted: Published: Monday, Feb. 14, 2011 9:33 p.m. MST Brain fog is also a life force at the Waterville, Maine, house of Marc Pitman. He has a simple, standing request for his 11-year-old son: Shut your bedroom door. "He'll go to close the door, forget on the way and come back to the living room having left his door open." Second on dad's list of peeves: "Using utensils at the table, not his hands." Pitman relies on "auctioneer-like repetition" of common-sense instructions. Shelly Walker has a different strategy. She's through paying for the stuff her 11-year-old daughter loses. "In a week she lost one running shoe and her iPod Touch at school. She understands the value of cash." Sally Treadwell in Boone, N.C., has two girls, 17 and 14. Like Walker, she no longer pays to replace all the lost, broken, destroyed or submerged stuff, but she isn't ready to blame the brain. "I think the idea of teens being incapable of hanging onto stuff because of their developing brains is a very modern idea," she said. "There were five of us in our family. We didn't have much money and what we had we hung on to. Part of growing up is learning to be responsible for yourself. The world isn't disposable." Representatives for Bieber did not immediately respond to a request for comment. This entry passed through the Full-Text RSS service — if this is your content and you're reading it on someone else's site, please read our FAQ page at fivefilters.org/content-only/faq.php |
| Mom's the Word: What are my kids learning from my marriage? - San Jose Mercury News Posted: At ages 9, 6 and 1, our three are watching. Am I paying attention? My two younger ones probably know this: Dad is the tickler and is good for piggyback rides. Mom knows just what to cook and is good for sofa cuddles any time of the day. Dad has the last say on any video game purchases. Mom is the go-to girl for ice cream and chocolate. (It's a big thing with her.) But Firstborn Son is already managing more abstract ideas. He asks me for a glass of milk, "but only when you're done with what you're doing, Mom," he'll say. Thinking of others before self! Alleluia! Like his dad, he will try not to bother me too early in the morning on weekends, when "Mom has the day off," Hubby likes to say (sounding like a benevolent dictator, I might add.) And like his dad, Firstborn now knows the value of a well-timed "thanks for doing this" or a surreptitious hug "just because." But he is also learning the finer points of negotiating from watching Hubby and I decide on everything from what to eat for dinner to how to budget for a vacation. Hubby's philosophy is "choose your battles," meaning he usually gives in to his ol' ball and chain in most everyday things. (The adage, "If Mama ain't happy, ain't nobody happy," stands true in our home.) Lately, after a spate of angry outbursts (from Hubby and me), we've embarked on a "for-God's-sakes-just-laugh-more" agenda. This morning, Hubby wanted to shout at the kids because they were moving too slowly in the morning.Wonder Boy stomped away to put on his shoes, then came back, arms akimbo, and looking so much like an enraged leprechaun we both had to laugh. (Wonder Boy did not think this the least bit funny, and I suspect he will mention this in therapy someday.) But it made Hubby and me diffuse the situation. No skyrocketing blood pressure for him. No scolding about anger management from me. Emphasize the positive. Growing up, I watched my Mom serve Dad in every way: waiting for him before she ate her own dinner and teaching us kids to drop everything when he came home and run to give him a kiss hello. Dad, the introspective type, didn't express himself too much, but we delighted in the times he doted on Mom. On Sundays, all of us six daughters would pile on top of their bed and watch basketball games. Mom would break out the imported chocolates and she and Dad would tease each other and tickle each other before Dad would go back to watching basketball. I want our kiddos to remember moments like that: Firstborn Son and Wonder Boy will sometimes catch us hugging and we always extend our arms for a "family hug"! They say, "yuck!" when they see us kiss but I think they don't mind. Above all, I want them to see Mom and Dad are kind to one another. They say, "please" and "thank you," "I'm sorry," and "I promise," to each other and mean it. And the days when we fail to do that, I hope they remember we'll keep trying to live up to that standard for yet another day. Columnist Anissa V. Rivera can be reached at the San Gabriel Valley Newspaper Group, 1210 N. Azusa Canyon Road, West Covina, CA 91790. 626-301-1461 This entry passed through the Full-Text RSS service — if this is your content and you're reading it on someone else's site, please read our FAQ page at fivefilters.org/content-only/faq.php |
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