“Kate Gosselin Cruelly Punished Her Kids by "Disowning" Them -- Telling Them They Were ... - Huffingtonpost.com” plus 1 more |
| Posted: 13 Dec 2010 03:39 PM PST Here's what happened. The Mama Grizzly Sarah Palin pulled out all stops practicing with various shotguns to protect Kate Gosselin and her kids on their wilderness camping trip, filmed for the Dec. 12th episode of Sarah Palin's Alaska. Little did she anticipate that the Gosselettes' greatest danger would come from their hissy fit, hot-dog-throwing mother. Kate couldn't stand the cold, rainy, Alaskan wilderness -- "this is cruel and unusual punishment," she said in describing the adventure with Sarah and her pack of grandparents, kids and cousins. While the eight little Gosselettes had a "blast," fishing, making s'mores over the campfire and getting nature lessons from Sarah's brother, according to Sarah's dad Chuck, Kate huddled under a tarp and complained, "I'm freezing to the bone, I'm hungry." Grilled moose "hot dogs" were the final straw for Kate who threw hers on the ground and announced "I'm done now." The only problem was that when she asked her children if they wanted to stay -- they all replied "yes!" Kate's shocking response: "Goodbye, you're now a Palin, not a Gosselin!" With that, her dejected Gosselettes followed her out of the wilderness and headed back to civilization. So what effect would this heavy-handed guilt trip from their mother have on Kate's little kids? Click here to find out!
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| Daycare teacher's kids don't like sharing her - Boston Globe Posted: 13 Dec 2010 02:53 AM PST (This letter has been condensed) Barbara, Typically it is me at home after work with the children preparing dinner, bathing, maintaining the house, laundry, etc... Our schedule is pretty routine. My concern is with my 2 boys and their disrespectful behavior toward me when my husband is not home. They frequently tell me to shut up and that they are going to find another mommy along with several other mean, disrespectful remarks. I have tried time outs but they don't seem to help. They continually leave the area of time out. They even become violent at times, threatening to hit me or throwing toys across the room at me. They have also picked up the word "s**t" at school and will frequently use it. It is extremely embarrassing. I tried to ignore it at first, but I feel as if that approach does not work. They are not like this in school or with my husband. I always follow through with what I say. For example, if I say they have lost movie time, I do not allow them a movie that night. I have worked in the childcare field for 12 years now. I am able to control a preschool class of 20 children, but cannot manage my own two boys. I feel like my daughter is suffering by all of my attention being given to them. Please help!!! What can I do to regain their respect and make them understand that this behavior must end? I love both of my boys and they have their sweet and cuddly moments with me, but I am becoming very stressed out and feeling as if I am failing them as a mom. From: Alicia, Marlborough Dear Alicia, This is not a negative reflection on you as a parent or as a teacher, or on their love for you. If anything, it's the opposite. It's their way of showing that they do love you: Your boys are acting out because they are jealous of the time and attention they see you give to other children. This is their pay back for having to share you. One way to think about this? Every time they act out, pretend they are saying to you, "You're my mommy. I'm angry that I have to share you!" I know they've been in the same center since they were little babes, but they were too young to put it together in this way before. Your youngest one isn't there yet, but the older two (perhaps influencing each other) are cognitively putting the whole scene together in a new way. This isn't rational on their part, so don't even try to reason it through with them. But you could try to get to their feelings through games. Using dolls and stuffed animals, play "preschool" at home, where you are the teacher and they are who they really are, children in the school and also your kids. Have the dolls be the other children. Interact and take care of the dolls, but then turn to your kids and say, "I have to take care of these kids, that's my job. But you are the ones I really love. You are my children, and you are the most special to me." Play around with this. You could even ask them questions: "How does it make you feel when I'm with the other kids?" Tell them how you feel: "I have to take care of the other kids, but I wish I could only be with you." Another thought: is there any way for you to disengage from work for even five minutes a day to spend it exclusively with your kids, either individually or all together? That would be a way for them to not have to share you, and a way for you to say to them, "This is the best part of the day, spending time with you." Another thought is that when they start to exhibit some of these acting out behaviors, find ways to redirect them: "I can see you're getting frustrated. You can't hit, but here's a pillow you can punch." I'm betting that with a little bit of time, this change will reduce their acting out. In the meantime, I wonder if you aren't as good at follow-through as you think you are. Consequences need to be immediate. Taking away movie night, which will happen hours after their misbehavior, doesn't help them connect their misbehavior to the consequence. Remember that the most significant consequence is the removal of your (temporary) attention. If they hit or use bad words (which you need to label specifically for them), say, "I can't play with you when you hit," and turn your back or leave the scene. In a few minutes, ask calmly, "Are you ready to try again to play without hitting?" By the way, don't be too hard on yourself. Three kids under the age of 6 is not easy! That you work so many hours and often don't have the help of your spouse -- that's hard!! Give yourself some credit! Readers, are any of you daycare teachers who have experienced this? I answer a question from a reader every weekday. If you want help with some aspect of child-rearing, just write to me here. This entry passed through the Full-Text RSS service — if this is your content and you're reading it on someone else's site, please read our FAQ page at fivefilters.org/content-only/faq.php |
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